Choice Making Counseling

CHANGE YOUR BELIEFS

CHANGE YOUR FEELINGS

CHANGE YOUR LIFE

Example Dialogue

The dialogue below is an example of an Option Process Dialogue. Joe is the Explorer and Jackie is the Mentor. Joe wanted to “explore” way he was uncomfortable about owning an older car.

Jackie: What would you like to explore today?
Joe: I worry about my car

Jackie: Why do you worry about your car?
Joe: It is old.

Jackie: Why do you worry about it being old?
Joe: I worry that it might break down on the expressway.

Jackie: Even though it might break down on the expressway, why are you worried about that?
Joe: I might be stranded on the expressway.

Jackie: What do you mean by stranded?
Joe: Well, I worried that I might be stranded, but I have AAA roadside service, so I could call them to come and help me. But it would still be inconvenient.

Jackie: How do you feel about that?
Joe: Worried.

Jackie: Why?
Joe: Because I might be late for an appointment. But, I have my cell phone and could call whoever the appointment was with, if I was going to be late.

Jackie: So, even though your car is old, what do you believe would happen if you weren’t worried about it breaking down?
Joe: I don’t know.

Jackie: Will being worried keep it from breaking down?
Joe: Do you mean I could know it might break down and not worry about it?

Jackie: What do you think?
Joe: I never thought about that before. I could know my car is old, and not worry about it breaking down. If it does, I’ll call AAA, but I don’t have to worry about it happening.

Jackie: Do you believe that?
Joe: Yes.

Jackie: Do you feel finished with that?
Joe: Yes, thank you.

“If I had 60 minutes to solve a problem and my life depended on it, I’d spend 55 minutes determining the right question to ask. Once I got the right question, I could easily answer it in 5 minutes.”

-Albert Einstein

OPTION PROCESS® DIALOGUES

One of the techniques I use in my client sessions is Choice Making Dialogues as learned at the Option Institute Learning and Training Center in Sheffield, Massachusetts.

These dialogues are a gentle way of helping clients know themselves better and know why they are feeling the way they are feeling, and behaving the way they are behaving. The dialogue is a tool to fundamentally change how we look at the world and help us understand why we believe what we believe.

These dialogues are based on the premise that all of our feelings and actions (behaviors) are caused by our beliefs. Once we are aware of the beliefs that are driving us, we can choose to drop the disempowering ones that fuel unhappiness, fear, anxiety, and unwanted behaviors.

In the dialogues I ask questions about individual’s feelings and beliefs, without judging them in any way. I believe that everyone has his/her own best answers and the dialogue process is a wonderful way for individuals to access their answers.

The clarity attained in these dialogues is profound, and gives individuals a sense of clarity and self-empowerment previously unknown to them.

Suggested Reading:

Happiness is a Choice, Barry Neal Kaufman

To Love is to be Happy With, Barry Neal Kaufman

Example Dialogue

OPTION PROCESS® DIALOGUES

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